I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
