My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
