we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
