I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
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