the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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