You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
