So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
