I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
How does it feel to date your dad?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
