I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
