I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
