If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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