You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
