Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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