she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I love how my cats smell like pot.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
