So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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