walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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