I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
This is the high leading the old right now
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
