he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I don't deserve a penis
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
