I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
