Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
The dick lei will go down in squad history
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
