it wasn't lemon gatorade
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
