There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
