i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
