Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
