my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
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