You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Randomize
