I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
