the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
