the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize