they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
