just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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