I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
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