playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
