After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize