return my video game
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
