Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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