Three words: puerto rican gang bang
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
