remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I think weed is turning my hair brown
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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