I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
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