i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Send help, water and tortillas.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize