he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Randomize
