bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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