Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I wish I only lived at night.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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