her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
