Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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