Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Randomize