why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
