Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
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