Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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