Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize