Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
honey bunches of taint.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize