what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I'm both gender and math confused
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
