I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Randomize
